Chapter 1

December 23, 2009

I am sorry to say it, but as far as excitement over major holidays goes, Christmas isn’t really my thing.

I don’t have any objections to Christmas on religious or cultural grounds; in fact, I don’t really have any objections to Christmas at all. I think the protests by the sensibly secular in this great land of ours against the public celebration of Christmas are largely misguided expenditures of energy and emotion by basically well-meaning people who should put their earnest efforts into something of more practical value, like fighting world hunger or class divisions or economic disparity, or saving the rain forests.

Or, they can go fuck themselves, too. Whichever.

My vague disaffection with the holiday season is not based strictly on anti-commercialism, either. I don’t have a problem with the most of the “commercialization” of Christmas – in the generic sense, at least. In fact, I think the crassness of the season may well inadvertently reinforce the basic decency in most of us, and even cause us to consider, if briefly, moral values we might not think much about otherwise, at Christmas time, or any other time.

We go out shopping this time of year fight mind-numbing gridlock on the roads and the vehicular transgressions of other drivers in scary mall parking lots, and yet most of us seem to retain some basic good cheer; at least partly, I think, because we are reminded this time of year that it truly is better to give than to receive.

The tangled up traffic can promote road rage in some cases, but it also offers multiple opportunities to do something nice for a somebody – letting him or her cut in line; or yielding that parking spot you have been eyeing for five minutes and parking instead a half a block further away; or just holding open a door for some poor bastard loaded down with bags and packages.

The overcrowded stores we wade into are often stressful and irritating; but on the other hand, we cannot stay aloof in a crowded store for long, no matter how hard we might try. One cannot stand in a queue at Best Buy for two-and-a-half hours and not talk to one’s neighbors in line; and if they seem relatively bright and/or mentally stable, one might even get to know them a little bit, no matter who they are or what they look like. The neighborly conversation flows naturally, and even if the catalyst for it is simply to commiserate on the consistently shitty customer service one finds practically everywhere nowadays, you can only talk about that stuff for so long.  Pretty soon you end up talking about other things, the weather, things you have in common, etc. That is the fun part. I sometimes find even a superficial conversation with a stranger in a long, slow-moving line will lower the blood pressure a bit, even make me feel a little better about the world, and maybe myself, too.

If you are like me, you get a little head rush out of doing something nice for or being nice to someone you don’t know, for no good reason. It is a pleasant feeling of well-being that just may have something to do with this ‘Christmas cheer’ one hears about this time of year.

So, I guess I have a positive feeling about Christmas, mostly. It is just that there are some celebrated cultural touchstones regarding the Christmas holidays I feel like I must have missed out on somehow.

I don’t like Christmas music much, for one thing. Some people I know get almost rapturous in late November or early December when they break out the Christmas music for the first time, digging out some Mannheim Steamroller CDs, a Pat Boone cassette or two, and, way in the back of the cabinet there, a scratchy old Harry Belafonte LP that has a great version of “Little Drummer Boy” on it.

Personally, I am indifferent to most traditional yuletide music. There are some non-traditional Christmas songs I kind of like. John Prine’s “Christmas in Prison” comes to mind, or maybe Springsteen and Little Steven and the E-Streeters doing “Merry Christmas, Baby.” At a holiday get-together once, I was asked what my favorite Christmas song was, and I blurted out, “Stranger in a Strange Land”. That brought some vacant stares. “You know, the Leon Russell song.” More incomprehension.

Listen to the lyrics sometime, is all I can say.

**********

I don’t have strong nostalgic feelings for Christmases past as some seem to. I have good memories, but I think part of my problem has to do with growing up with not much extended family around who at least got along well enough to get together for the holidays. The concept of huge Norman Rockwell-ish family get-togethers, all of us sitting around the groaning board eating goose and brandied plums and bread pudding at Christmas-time does not resonate with me.

Probably another impediment to me connecting with the Christmas atmosphere is that I grew up in a sub-tropical climate. I have seen snow at Christmas exactly twice in my life, and I am sure people from snow country would have laughed at it, as it was mostly just a dusting. In fact, it was often warm and humid enough around Christmas time here to wear shorts and a T-shirt. When I was 14 we had a warm front come through off the Gulf of Mexico right before Christmas, 75-80 degrees and humid as hell, and in the course of helping get our house and grounds looking nice for holiday visitors, I actually had to go out and mow the fucking yard. . . because it was three days before Christmas, and the St. Augustine was still growing. I remember pushing this heavy old self-propelled Sears mower that didn’t self-propel around the yard, sweating my ass off, all the while singing, “Mow the (fucking) yard and trim the (goddamn) hedges/Fa la la la la, la la la la”.

So there you have it, the confessions of one Southeast Texas semi Grinch-like individual.

“When the baby looks around him
It’s such a sight to see
He shares a simple secret
With the wise man”

**********

Well, I exaggerate a little. I’m not really a Grinch. In fact, I am kind of looking forward to Christmas this year.

Ed Wade and company seem intent on low-keying their way through the holidays, so far opting to put money down for stocking stuffers, rather than spending on any big ticket items. But there is always the chance they will surprise us. When I was a kid we’d look at the Sears toy catalog, and I’d secretly wish for about 2/3 of what was on every page. Nowadays, I am more realistic. All I want is a quality #2 starter, another solid bat for the lineup, and someone, anyone, above run-of-the-mill to emerge at catcher. That’s not asking for too much, is it?

My kids are ridiculously cheerful this time of year, of course, and act a bit more respectful toward their old man and his requests of them than usual. No doubt they have an idea in mind of not screwing up their potential presents from their mom and I. Not perfectly altruistic on their part, but I’ll take it.

I will get to see some family in the next few days I don’t see as often as I’d like to. And, I’m supposed to be getting a Kindle™ for my birthday (Christmas Eve), so I am pretty stoked about that. . . So anyway, you know, this Christmas could turn out to be a pretty good one, after all. Maybe that is why I have been walking around the last few days humming that “do you hear what I hear?” song playing in my head.

I recall that after all the hassle and hustle and bustle, for a brief moment on Christmas morning there is usually a sort of lull; a quiet time between opening gifts around the tree in the living room, and moving on to the dining room to commence the chowing down. In that lull, that quiet time, is it possible that some perhaps supernatural knowledge may be bestowed upon one, if one is open enough and enough at peace with oneself and the world to receive it? If so, then maybe all the things having to do with Christmas, the secular and the religious, the ridiculous and the sublime, will be put in order in one’s mind, if just for a brief moment.

It may even be just possible, in the brief quiet, to hear a voice, but faintly; singing of what this season is really all about, and why it all still matters as much as it does.

”And the baby looks around him
And shares his bed of hay
With the burro in the palace of the king”

He’s a stranger in a strange land
Tell me why. . . “

**********

And so it is Christmas. No, the war ain’t over, but I think am going to celebrate a little anyway.

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays, Feliz Navidad and Happy Hanukkah, and Kwanzaa, and Ashura, and Happy New Year, too; to all of Whoopass Nation, and those beyond. . . to those within, and those without. Peace.

It does not matter who you are or what you look like or where you came from or what-all you believe in. You are my brother.

And, oh yeah, Peace on Earth, too. Maybe one day.

_________________________________________________

Random reactions, comments and notes on the hiring of Brad Mills as Astros Manager.

Terry Francona on Brad Mills and his new role with the Astros (from Amalie Benjamin at the Boston Globe):

“He’s wanted this. I’m so proud, not just of him, but for him. He’s not going to shortchange anybody on effort. He embodies so much of what’s good in our game. I’m so happy for him. This meant a lot to him, as it should. I’m so thrilled for him. How much we’re going to miss him, sure, but it’s so far outweighed by happiness.”

“Attack is a good word,” of how Mills will take on his new role. “He’s got a lot of skills that are going to help make him a successful manager. He understands communication. He respects the players. I think he’ll make the players be accountable, all the things we’ve talked about for six years in Boston. He’s a smart baseball person and he’s a very good person. That’s a pretty good combination.

“We’ve been friends for 30 years. You can’t replace that. He got his chance to do his own thing. We’re so happy for him, but replacing him won’t be easy, that’s a given.”

__________

More from Francona on Mills (from Ian Brown at MLB.com):

“I’m proud for him. He’s one of my best friends, not just in the game but in life. We’ve been together for 30 years. It’s a little bit bittersweet, because it’s our loss, [but] their gain far outweighs how I feel about losing him.”

On whether Mills is ready to step up to the next level:

“I think he’s ready. He’s been ready. That’s subjective, but he’s been working his whole life toward this. When he was second in charge, he did a great job. Now he’s going to be making the decisions, and he’ll do a great job. You can’t find a better guy. He deserves this opportunity. Again, I hope he takes it and runs with it. I’m thrilled for him.”

On not having Mills by his side in Spring Training next year:

“I’ve probably taken it for granted that everybody is where they’re supposed to be because he’s so good at it. We’ll certainly have to make some adjustments. But his gain far outweighs any adjustments we have to make. Millsy embodies so much of what is good in baseball. For him to get an opportunity, it sure is nice. It sure is exciting for all of us.”

__________

Tim Bogar on the Mills hiring (via Tag’s Lines):

“He’s put in his time and diligence in being a bench coach for [Francona] for a long time and learned quite a bit from him and also his time with the Expos and all the way back to Philly. If there’s one guy who deserves a chance to run a team, it’s Brad Mills. Having a chance to run the Astros is going to be perfect for him. Not only is he a capable manager, but also one of the best teachers I’ve been around.

“With the [Astros'] situation on the left side of the infield and the catching situation [and playing youngsters], he’s going to be perfect for those young players. Being in Boston and being round veteran players, he knows how to handle them and knows how to do things to compete and he obviously understands the pitching aspect of it.

“I think they made a great hire, and Brad is going to be everything everyone is looking for as a manager. He may not be a huge name, but you can’t ask for a better quality individual.”

__________

Footer chimes in with the skinny on Mills from Friend No. 1 and Friend No. 2 (Alyson’s Footnotes)

“Once I learned that Brad Mills was hired as the Astros manager, I reached out to two good friends who have covered the Red Sox for parts or all of the last decade and asked them simply, “What do you think of Brad Mills?” Here’s what I received back:”

Friend No. 1:
“Mills is a genuinely nice guy and he did an amazing job turning the Sox into such a well-run machine. He’s so efficient at everything he does. He’s not a great quote but he’s friendly and respectful. He’s the ultimate taskmaster.”

Friend No. 2:
“Tremendously organized. Probably the most organized coach I’ve ever been around. He had basically every day of Spring Training plotted out weeks in advance of camp, with charts on where everyone is at all times.

“He was a big help to Francona on the bench, helping pitchers with pickoff moves, etc., and aligning the defense, etc. He had great communication skills with the players and has been Francona’s confidant since their days as roommates at Arizona.

“I’ve never heard anyone say a bad word about Brad Mills. And being around Francona on the Red Sox bench for the last six years can only help from an experience standpoint.”

A couple of things stood out to Footer from the responses:

1) both said Mills was incredibly organized and 2) Friend No. 2 pointed out that Mills is good at aligning defenses. And can I just say, hallelujah on both counts. The Astros are already better off in ‘10 than they were in ‘09, and they’re more than five months away from playing a game that counts in the standings.

__________

Astros players and a coach on having Mills as their new manager (by McTaggart at Astros.com):

Lance Berkman

“Certainly I’d love to get together with him before we get started at some point to meet him and talk to him and see kind of what he’s all about and that sort of thing,” Berkman said. “It’s weird because at least with the other managers we’ve had, going into the season we knew a little bit about him. He’s kind of an unknown to me, but I’m looking forward to getting to know him. I’ve heard great things.”

Hunter Pence:

“I’m excited to look at the next chapter of the Astros and our season and hopefully we get moving in right direction.”

“We all have to get to know each other and really get on the same page and get started winning and get a winning attitude and mentality,” Pence said. “It’s the first time since I’ve been here a manager has come in from outside the organization, so I’m just looking forward to seeing what he’s going on.

“[General manager] Ed Wade and [owner] Drayton [McLane] and all the Astros management believe in this guy. He must have something going on and he was with a winning ballclub in Boston. It’s exciting to have a leader like that.”

Sean Berry:

One person that does know Mills well is Astros hitting coach Sean Berry, who lives relatively close to Mills in central California. “He’s got everything you need to be a successful manager and bringing those intangibles and that experience from Boston, that should really help him,”

Bud Norris:

Astros pitcher Bud Norris played with Mills’ son, Beau, in the Arizona Fall League and against him in college. Norris, who’s one of the young players Mills will have to rely on in years to come, listened to the press conference to announce Mills’ hiring and was thrilled with what heard.

“He had a good demeanor and good approach,” Norris said. “It’s good to hear him say the fact he appreciates the veteran guys and he’s going to push them and it sounds great because I know he’s going to push me, too, and I liked to be pushed. If we can fill in those last pieces in the lineup card, we should have a good outlook for next year.”

__________

Zach Levine at the Chronicle discusses Brad Mills and the state of on-field management

“What’s Brad Mills like as a manager as it relates to what goes on between the lines? Who knows? The regime that one is a part of as a bench coach doesn’t necessarily imply anything about the one he will lead.”

I’d think I’d have added something along the lines of ‘a bench coach working under a good manager does not necessary a good manager make’ (e.g. see Cooper, Cecil), but Levine’s point is appropriate includes an example from the Rays under Maddon’s tenure as manager:

Look at one of the most successful bench coaches-turned-managers of this decade, Joe Maddon. Immediately before his first managerial gig, he was part of the Small-ball Society in Anaheim under Mike Scioscia, whose Angels teams, for better or worse, were near the top of the list in giving up outs for bases. Maddon’s Rays hardly ever sacrifice like the Angels did, but the Rays do, given the speed of Carl Crawford and B.J. Upton, steal bases.

The article also discusses forward and backwards steps made by the Astros during Cooper’s tenure (including worn out bullpens) and asks:

“What do you think is the most important aspect of in-game managing that you think Mills needs to improve in Houston?”

__________

Glad you asked.

First, before we launch into some far too often explored yet sometimes misunderstood sports/baseball strong held truths, let me start by saying if you research (re: google) the words Leadership and Management, you’re going to find strong opinions on why these two things are not the same.  A small sampling if you will:

• Leaders lead people, managers manage task.
• Leadership and management are two notions that are often used interchangeably but these words actually describe two different concepts.
• To lead, be a coach, not a manager.
• Leadership is an asset a successful manager must possess.

By now, you probably have a very good idea where I’m heading with this so let’s just go ahead and get it out of the way: Cecil Cooper showed all of us that while he could manage task well enough to be successful in baseball (stop laughing, he wasn’t that bad a “manager”), his leadership skills left a little to be desired.  Was that important?  Yes, somewhat.  No, make that very much so.  I know some will argue that even managing task were a boon-doggle for Coop.  Thank you Geoff Blum, now sit down please.  So what is the big deal about leadership to manage a baseball team?  You got nine guys, a ball, some gloves, some bats and all you have to do is make sure you manage the strategy and let the players do the rest.  Okay, here is why in many ways it is very important. Leadership comes in two flavors on a baseball team: peer-to-peer, or better said veteran-to-not-so-veteran and of course manager-to-player.  If this is true, why is the duality of leadership needed?  Can’t players do that leadership thingy and thus allow the manager to just concentrate on filling out a lineup card correctly?

Glad you asked (part two).

Where some fall in the long held truths in baseball when it comes to managers is that the manager’s job is to manage the task within a game, a series and of course a very long season.  Do that well and you will succeed they say.  Whitey Herzog may have not been the first one to say it, but he is well known to repeat it often enough: “To win in baseball, you need a lot of luck and a strong bullpen”.  I don’t disagree that if you have the talent, the depth on the bench, good to great pitching and a little bit of luck come your way, you can be so-so as a leader and yet manage strategy well enough to be the next manager to get a ring with the word “World Series Champion” inscribed on it.  But tell me something, how many teams outside of New York, Boston or Los Angeles have the sort of money to insure themselves against a manager who really has little to no leadership skills whatsoever?  Okay, I agree: not many.  Certainly not the Houston Astros, the team we all root for and of course the team with an owner who just won’t act like a spend crazy lunatic owner who will buy the next World Championship.

I’m not bitter.  Really.

So back to what we’re talking about – leadership and management.  I do believe that if you have a strong player/leader presence in the clubhouse, you will mitigate the very skill lacking in a manager.  In fact, some managers will welcome not having to display leadership qualities because most of them learned how to manage by the very people who managed them.  By and large, it’s been about players policing themselves in terms of leadership and of course managers managing the task and the two being somewhat working in a symbiotic relationship.  You probably already figured out that the best years that the Houston Astros franchise has ever had were the same years that number 5 and 7 donned the uniform of the local nine.  In fact, it was not such a good idea for a manager to try and become a vocal, even harsh “leader” for the team during that time because it could clash with the two player’s influence on the others.  I give you Terry Collins for example, a manager prone to bouts of vitriolic rants to try and prove his leadership ability.  All for naught too.

So who could blame a managerial candidate really not wanting or even expecting to be a leader in the Houston clubhouse.  If you want leadership, well that is what coaches are for, blah, blah, blah.  Did you happen to hear these words this summer: “As a manager, all I can do is fill out the lineup card and try to change it every once and while to see if I can break us out of the funk we’re in”.  Whether this was a statement uttered in defense of a lack of leadership or not, the end result is that it proved what most managers really do expect their job to be.  Task oriented skills primarily and of course mostly.

With the absence of Bagwell and Biggio now very much accepted and stamped into the Houston Astros scene, the idea of a leader in the clubhouse to mitigate a manager’s deficiencies in this area is very much a necessity.  You may think players like Berkman, Lee or Oswalt were the ones given the baton by Bagwell and Biggio, but the reality is that not many see any of those gentlemen as true leaders.  In comes Miguel Tejada and in a few short years, this player who has little time in and around the Houston organization, propels himself into a leadership role.  His work ethic, his attitude, his passion was rubbing off on this team, so perhaps there was a chance of the symbiotic relationship blossoming in Houston this summer.  Leadership and Management, wow, it can happen.  And then of course, some failed bullpen management (or abuse) during the dog days of summer plus some really unlucky health issues to key players, and there is nothing leadership and management could do to make it work.  Wrong moves on management side could only make it worse, and there was some of that for sure.

So where are the Houston Astros today?

As of the end of the season, you can pretty much toss a coin in the air if Miguel Tejada is coming back.  My hunch is no, he will not be back, and I think it will be a mutually agreed upon split.  Houston will not want an aging shortstop and Miguel will probably want to go somewhere else to play for his last shot or shots at glory.  The organization for its part is in search of a manager.  Be not dismayed at the list you have been privy to in terms of candidates, all of them can manage.  Here is what I want to know:

Is there one amongst them that can lead?

Astros Recap

The moment finally arrived. This has been one of the most interesting seasons to date in my Astros viewing history. I think for most of us the ups and downs of a season were not the fun roller coaster we usually enjoy. It seemed like all the ups led to worse downs than we normally expect. We had the ups of Wandy’s break out season, getting to one game of the division lead before the All-Star break, Bourn finally being inserted into the lead-off spot (and doing a good job there) and players hitting homerun and base hit milestones. But those downs just came a lot more often. There were the reactionary line-ups, manager moves, mismanaged benches, arms falling off of pitchers (and sometimes their legs), player discontent, and so on and so on. But through it all we watched and wanted our team to end up with different results.

I’ve been giving this moment a lot of thought over the last couple weeks. A lot of people use Labor Day as the marking of the end of summer, for me it is the baseball season. There are no more offers of “hey I have an extra ticket to the game, want to go?”, or “I’m going to the game tonight, are you? Want to meet up?”, and even the “did you watch the Astros last night?” For many of us, there is football and other events that will consume our lives like the Astros do during the summer. But there is still the moment of “damm it is really over isn’t it?” that comes at the end of a season. It is very sad for me.

I’ll drive by Minute Maid Park off and on during the offseason and miss the boys, those banners on the outside just aren’t the same as seeing them on the field. The playoffs aren’t the same when my boys aren’t in it (I’m rooting for Minnesota at this moment, but they may not even make it).

But one of the things I miss the most is what I call my baseball friends. You all. The TalkZone seems to slow down and there seems to be sadness about. We all just wait for the Astros do something, almost anything (be careful what you wish) to have some baseball to discuss.

I miss the get-togethers where we share a beer (or many), tease each other and just hang out whether online or in person. Many of you have been and have become very dear friends to me. And you all are what the Astros give me each season and for that I can not be disappointed in the season.

I don’t expect a lot of splash in the off-season by the Astros’ front office. Sure there is a lot to fix on this team, a lot, but I don’t think there is a budget in Drayton’s office that is going to allow them to go out and buy us a World Series. I think we are going to have to wait a good 2-3 years for the prospects in the farm system to mature and hope the next version of Bagwell, Biggio and Caminiti come along in their own form.

We seemed ready for this moment, waited for this moment that seemed like we were ready for yet not, at the same time.

I hope everyone has a happy and safe off season, see you around.

Friday, October 2  6:10 p.m.

Wandy Rodriguez, LHP (14-11, 2.97) vs  John Maine, RHP (6-6, 4.72)

Wandy has been a pleasant surprise for me this year.  He has pitched much better than his 14-11 record would indicate–just look at that 2.97 ERA.  Before the season began, if I had been told that he would have an ERA under 3 going into the last series of the season, I would have been estatic.   It has been a year of milestones for Wandy with career highs for wins (14), starts (31), innings pitched (199 2/3) and strikeouts (190) leading into his last start of the year.  Wandy has had considerable trouble against Beltran, Schneider and Francoeur in his career and he faces them in Citi Park for the first time.  Maine missed a good chunk of the season with a gimpy right shoulder, and recently returned to the rotation to post a 1-2 record for the month of September. Current Astros are hitting .317 against him in a total of 67 ABs.  

 Saturday, October 3, 12:10 p.m.

Yorman Bazardo, RHP (1-2, 8.23) vs Pat Misch, LHP (2-4, 4.71)

Bazardo pitched lights out against the Phillies on Monday, his first major league win since September 2007.  He has very little experience against the Metropolitans–the only Stem to face him is David Wright who is 2 for 2 with 2 RBI.  Misch pitched only the second complete game of the year for the Mets in his last start on Sunday, when he pitched an 8 hit shoutout.  No current Astro has had more than 6 PA vs Misch, and only two have extra base hits against him. 

Sunday, October 4, 12:10 p.m.

Wilton Lopez, RHP (0-1, 9.42)   vs. The Dreaded TBA

Can’t say much about Wilton Lopez other than this is his second major league start. Wiltonspent most of his season at  Double-A Corpus Christi going 4-5 with a 4.73 ERA, including a 3-5 record with a 3.91 ERA as a starter.  He started on Tuesday against the Phillies and the only thing I can remember is the grand slam he gave up to Pedro Feliz.  Can’t say anything about his opponent, because TBA is such a chameleonic SOB.

Who is hurt?

More like who isn’t hurt.  And if you had listed everyone who spent time on the DL between these two teams during the season, this preview wouldn’t be able to hold it.

 Giveaways

Just a few closing remarks

I hate to see the end of the baseball season.  I miss being able to catch a game almost any night of the week, and hearing the announcer “And he goes into the windup, and here’s the pitch……”  I will miss the sound of the bat on the ball, and the call of the umpire “SAFE!!” as the runner slides into the plate on a perfectly executed squeeze play.  And it is not just the major league game that I miss. I have put three sons through Little League and I am sad to report that the third one just informed us last night that he didn’t think he wanted to play baseball anymore.  Next year will be my first year in 11 years not to have a son in Little League.  My second son is unsure if he wants to try out for the JV team this coming season.  He likes baseball just fine, however basketball is his passion.  Hope does spring eternal though, the youngest will be able to start playing in a year if he chooses to, and the circle will begin again.   

Astros 5
Phillies 3

W: Paulino | L: Lee

astros.com
AP via Yahoo!
No Game Zone

The Astros won. Salvaged a road split. Phillies were probably a bit hung over but they still need momentum and home field wouldn’t hurt. Anyway, Twinkie slapped a gapper in the 1st that brought home 2 and the lead held, with help from Miggy’s 2-runner in the 6th and RBI single in the 7th. Paulino was on, with run support this time and that translated into a W. Valverde did his best Lidge imitation but held on.

Some of you know, my girlfriend of 15+ years is a baseball fan, and a Phillies fan. She hails from the west suburbs of Philadelphia and is no bandwagonner. Of course, recently her passion has shot up a few notches but the fact that we spent a good part of our initial courtship period at spring training games and that we continue to enjoy baseball together are things that help keep both of us happy. She’s too young to remember 1980 with any passion and for me, ‘86 was far worse personally so we’ve never had much to hate about the other’s team. She backed the Astros in ‘04 and ‘05 when I was preoccupied with them every waking hour. I couldn’t embrace the Phillies last year, the Rays have earned 2nd place in this fan’s heart and she understood. They’re her #2 as well.

So here I am. The Phillies clinch their 2nd straight division title against the Astros. No big deal really, the Good Guys have been out of it for a few weeks now since late July. It’s time for me to step up as a supportive boyfriend and do my best to share her excitement for her childhood team, right? At least refrain from the wry comments when she wears her Victorino jersey to work every other day, right? Sheepishly smile at the ear-splitting screams with every Phillies base hit, right? Nod in acceptance when she suggests Chase Utley be added to her “list”, right?

It would be bad if I latched on the the Dodgers’ bandwagon, right?

This is my last recap of the year and I want to thank the entire SnS team for letting me bloviate once or twice a week on their dime. Noe, Andy, HH, Waldo, Arky, Spack, you continue to maintain the greatest Astros fan site on the web. I especially want to thank pravata, who gave a ton of his time and effort to cut through the clutter and help me find information I could use. Also, to BudGirl, who picked up the tough task of scheduling and recruiting recap writers and did it well. Sorry for the one I missed. Thanks to the other recap writers who keep the bar high and to everyone who actually realizes there is a SnS front page and reads these things. To the series preview writers who blow me away with their creativity. The columnistas whose talent and wit seem endless. And finally, the Bus Ride guys. I spend the least amount of time there because, quite honestly, the depth of the information there intimidates me. The most comprehensive Astros minor league fan sites out there.

May the Phillies repeat, the void be short, and the 2010 SnS Opening Day/Cabrito Fest be the biggest ever!

Astros Recap
Yahoo Recap

I don’t think anyone not rooting for a team in the NL East cares much about this game or this series. This Astros loss brought the Phillies to the magic number of one.

There was no GameZone to look for commentary on the game.

Check out GreatBagwellBeard’s Series Preview for information about the rest of the series, if you care.

• The Texans fumble away victory in ways that remind me uncomfortably of my junior year of high school.
• The Cowboys stadium is more interesting than their team.  And the stadium is only interesting for being the most self-aggrandizing shrine to ego since the Taj Mahal.  To which it (really) compares itself.
• Politics is still a shitshow of name-calling, hyperbole, and cronyism.  I wish I could stage cage fights between Birthers and 9/11 Truthers.
• The Rockets are clearing planning on bombing this season with the goal of a franchise-boosting lottery pick, but everyone’s okay with this because we have basketball’s Billy Beane on our side.  Hoo-fucking-ray.
• The only good new show of this TV season features Joseph Fiennes making this face for an hour each night:

Rocky Mountian oysters are what?

• And last but not least,  Academy stores across Houston are selling out of Cougars gear as the UofH bandwagon has gotten so crowded that there’s no room for Dick Justice to jump on…yet.   When he does, he’ll make a bad pun about that shitty Courtney Cox sitcom, Cougar Town.

Well, shit.  Looks like we’re stuck with the flailing Astros, who look like an ugly guy at last call who’s just realized that not even the fat chick with the lazy eye is going home with him tonight, even though it looked like she was winking earlier*.

The only interesting story lines at this point are who’s going to manage next year, who’s going to pitch next year, and if Tommy Manzella will decompose before he gets another start.  Exciting!  The only really heartbreaking thing for me right now is the fact that (short of Clark getting the managerial nod), Sean Berry will be getting his walking papers this off-season, which sucks because he’s responsible for the only real flash of hope this season in the form of Michael Bourn.  Le sigh.

Probable Pitchers from MLB.com

Monday, September 28th

6:05 CT, Citizens Bank Park

Yorman Bazardo (0-2, 9.55) v. Cole Hamels (10-9, 4.11)

As Prince once said, I could never take the place of Yorman, but at this point, I’d let the Purple One start a game just to see if he made little noises when he releases pitches.  Despite a decent start last week against the Co-ards, Bazardo still doesn’t have a win on the season.  He’s faced the Phils once and (as his ERA indicates) it didn’t go well.

Hamels got bitten by the injury bug this season, and when healthy, he hasn’t been exactly an ace.  Not bad, just not the guy he was in the WS last year.  He’s been hit well by Miggy, Kepp, Michaels, and Berkman, so our best hope here is for a slugfest.

Tuesday, September 29th

6:05 CT, Citizens Bank Park

Wilton Lopez (0-0, 8.44) v. J.A. Happ (11-4, 2.79)

Lopez gets his first start of the season on the heels of his dashing appearance on the rookie road trip.  You go girl, or something.  Lopez wasn’t pegged by our Bus Riders as a particularly dazzling MLB prospect, but you never know until you let them have a five run first inning.

Happ has been very impressive in his rookie season, and should pair with Hamels and Cliff Lee to make the Phillies’ rotation pretty deadly in the postseason.  He’s never faced the Astros before, and as we all know, that means that he’ll look like Cy Fucking Young on Tuesday.  The fact that he’s already pretty damned good means that we better hope for a hurricane to strike the City of Brotherly Love and wipe his ass and his Army of Northern Virginia general name off the map.

Wednesday, September 30th

6:05 CT, Citizens Bank Park

Brian Moehler (8-11, 5.21) v. Cliff Lee (14-12, 3.19)

As Mo goes, so goes the team.  No, really.  When he’s on, the team is surging; when he’s struggling, the team is in the doldrums.  Not sure which direction is labeled “cause” and which one is “effect”, but it is at least consistent.  Ryan Howard, Jason Weryth and Shane Victorino all abuse Moehler, but he owns Raul Ibanez.

Lee was brought over from the Indians to be the final piece to help the Phils repeat, and he’s been almost as good as advertised.  He’s pitched a league-leading 226 innings, so he might be getting a little weary.  Hunter is perfect against him, and as a whole the team is batting .333 against him, with Bourn the only starter who doesn’t have a hit against him yet.

Thursday, October 1

6:05 CT, Citizens Bank Park

Felipe Paulino (2-11, 6.51) v. Pedro Martinez (5-1, 3.32)

See?  We are playing in October!  YAY!  Paulino’s strong September was spoiled by a lack of run support, but he seems like less of a lost cause than Bazardo. Yes, that’s the nicest thing I can say in this situation.  He’s never faced the Phillies.

Pedro’s jheri curl has had a good revival in Philly, and though I was among the skeptics that he had anything left in the tank, he’s proven to be a smart acquisition.  He’s had success against the Astros in the past, and only Kaz and Quintero have fared very well against him in the past.

Injuries

Astros:

Alberto Arias – done for the season after his arm twisted into a corkscrew like that one Looney Tunes where Bugs Bunny plays baseball.

Mike Hampton – Mike Hampton

Roy Oswalt -

Sparky!

Billy Sadler – acute obscurity

Phillies:

Scott Eyre – still pining for Jane

Brett Myers – lying, wife beating twat

Chan Ho Park – zombie-related side effects

J.C. Romero – strained left forearm.  He uses the overhand grip, ifyaknowwhatI’msayin.

Carlos Ruiz – Romero’s “battery-mate”.  Ahem.

Jack Taschner – writing book under about a brave journeyman pitcher with the last name “Barzilla”

Promotions

Sept. 28th: In The Biz Night!  Are you a hospitality worker?  We’re so sorry.  Have some cheap shitty seats and gross dollar hot dogs!

Otherwise, bubkis.

What To Watch For:

Fatties from Philly gorging on cheap hot dogs and fucking awful Yuengling at the game

The merciful end of this season

Wilton Lopez’s hot pants

Discuss in the Game Zone! Please.  OSF is getting lonely.

*July 22nd = not recognizing that it wasn’t a wink, it was a lazy eye.

Astros Recap
Yahoo Recap
Game Zone

If you were at this game then you know that you know that you had an opportunity to get a collectible cap and “coupons” for tickets for next season. Unfortunately an opportunity to get an Astros win was not available on the night.

Astros Highlights:

Kazuo Matsui went 2 for 4 on the night, with a homerun.

Tim Byrdak and Chad Paronto each pitched a scoreless inning of baseball.

Reds Highlights:

Joey Votto and Juan Francisco had pretty good nights at the plate.

Matt Maloney went 7 innings giving up 2 runs.

Game Analysis:

There really isn’t much to analyze at this point in the season. There doesn’t seem to be much interest by either fans or players.

Bench Tidbits:

Have a friend from NYC in town this weekend. Glad her sister decided to have all of us go to the Astros game. The company was great, the game as noted above was not. We went to a bar at Main and Alabama called the Big Top. I rather liked the place. You pretty much just sit around drinking. Many of you may be surprised, but I didn’t have a single drink on the night. Yeah, BudGirl didn’t drink.

Plans for Saturday include the UH–Texas Tech game. I am so excited. I have no idea who is going to win this game, but I am really hoping UH shows up and plays great football.

I am planning to save a life on Sunday by donating blood after madd, then I am going to the Texans game. I love free tickets!! Kick ass!!

One interesting story about an encounter at MMP Friday night. My friend Ana and I get our “coupons,” then become designated drivers for free coupons for a small drink, then continue onto our seats. While on the escalator we encounter a woman with a large stack of “coupons.” Apparently some guy behind us decides to ask why she has so many of the “coupons.” She tells him something, which we were trying to ignore. Then on the next section of the escalator she decides to ask me about the situation. I don’t know why she thought it was of interest to me. But she starts saying how she asked how many she could have and at least three different people told her she could have as many as she wanted. So, she proceeded to take as many as she wanted. I don’t think anyone really missed out on the “coupons.”

The thing that kind of amuses me about the whole thing is that the lady was thinking she had “season tickets” since she had so many of them. I don’t think she realized they were only good for Monday-Thursday games in April and May. She wanted to get something and took more than she really needed. I just hope she left the game happy with her “season tickets.”

It is time for me to get ready for the Cougars. ‘Eat’em up Coogs!!!!

Check out Mark Raup’s Series Preview for information about the rest of the last home series of the year.