The President, he’s got his war
Folks don’t know just what it’s for
Nobody gives us rhyme or reason
Have one doubt, they call it treason
We’re chicken-feathers, all without one nut. Damn it!
Tryin’ to make it real — compared to what?
Archive for the ‘Featured’ Category
Fuck You, Bud
On November - 15 - 2011
Sanchez squeezes off St. Louis steamer
On September - 28 - 2011
Monday, September 26th, 2011
Turds 4
Astros 5
W: New Dad! | L: Don’t ask Dotel
Fan Humiliation Day
On September - 25 - 2011
Rockies 19, Astros 3
W: Millwood (4-3)
L: Harrell (0-2)
As Norm MacDonald used to say, “It’s the anal rape.” Deliverance was visited on the Astros in their last Sunday game of the season, ironically falling on Fan Appreciation Day. They trotted out all their finery to excite the crowd, and it was ripped to shreds of mud and blood by the hungry jackals from Colorado.
Maybe You Saw It. I Didn’t.
On September - 18 - 2011
Astros 3, FTC 2
W: Myers (6-13)
L: Dempster (10-13)
Fucking Fox. I guess football is too damn big so 11 of the last 25 games, and all of the weekend games except for the very last Sunday in September are broadcast on that pipsqueak tin can network in Houston only. The network that isn’t good enough for football is good enough for the crusty leftovers that are Your Houston Astros.
FLESH AND BLOOD
On September - 18 - 2011
CHICAGO Immature Ursines 2, HOUSTON Tragic Spacemen 1
September 17, 2011
Already-Been-Chewed Field
WP: Don’t Know
LP: Don’t Care
SV: We are beyond saving, fucker
CHICAGO (SnS) – The unmighty Houston Astros ended a long season-long struggle here tonight on the North Side of Chicago . . . Chicago, the City of Feminine Shoulders, the Fudgepacker to the World; the lowly Houston nine reached the vaunted century mark in the loss column, by dropping an untense 2-1 heartstarter to the Chicago Fuck TCs. Read the rest of this entry »
Astros at Cubs – Bear Turds in the Food Chain
On September - 16 - 2011
This is my last preview of the season, and I’m wrapping up my ninth year writing them. I always figured I would go at least 10 years, so I’d be a 10-year veteran and couldn’t be traded to the fucking American League without my approval. I guess I never figured the Astros themselves would be traded to the AL. Ain’t that a kick in the nuts.